This page will show you how you can use astrology to better understand your own chart in relation to love, sex, and relationships. This page will mostly be focusing on intimate, romantic, and sexual aspects of relating.
There are multiple expressions and ways to love and have sex so tailor the descriptions to your specific situation and preferences. I do not use binary gender language in astrology.
What you will find on this page ♡
- Information on the main Astrological Houses I associate with relationships, sex, and love: 1st, 2nd, 5th, 7th, 8th, & 12th Houses
- Venus in relationship through each zodiac signs – Attraction
- Mars in relationship through each zodiac signs – Sexuality
- Mercury in relationship through each zodiac signs – Communication
- General info on types of astrology relationship charts: Synastry and Composite
Relationships are The Mirror
Relationships act as our mirrors. The connections we have with partners, family members, co-workers, and more reflect back to us our own sense of existence and vice versa.
We have within us the desire to be liked, loved, and appreciated. One of the ways we find this is through relationship and often find ourselves within the mirror of experiencing ourselves through another person.
The Pluto in Libra generation (1971-1983/4) ruled by Venus is helping us explore the depth and evolution of love while the Pluto in Scorpio generation (1984-1993) ruled by Mars is helping us explore deeper expressions of sex and sexuality in the context of our relationships.
Houses for Love + Relating in Astrology
1st-7th Houses of Self & Other
The Ascendent-Descendent axis runs through our 1st house of self and our 7th house of ‘other than us’. Balancing who we are in relationship to other people in our lives is reflected in this structure of our birth chart.
In the 1st house we are finding ourself and identity. When we reach the 7th house we are starting to relate and share that self with others. We share ourself through long term relationships, business and work partnerships, friendships, acquaintances, lovers, and more.
When it comes to love we often seek out partners who reflect the energy of the zodiac sign found on the 7th house. If you are a Scorpio Rising for example, you may seek out a partner who has Taurus like qualities of being very grounded, sensual, and earthy.
We find ourself being balanced when we partner with someone who represents what we need, desire, or feel ourselves to be developing. The multiple partnerships in our life can reflect how we are attempting to integrate these energies.
If you have multiple planets in the 7th house this can signify the importance you place on relating to a partner or others, and that vital role finding yourself through others in relationship plays for you.
A common myth is that if you have no planets in the 7th house you will never have a significant relationship. This is absolutely untrue! An astrological chart cannot prove your fate or destiny.
We all have a 7th house in the chart, we all have a zodiac sign located on the cusp of the 7th House/Descendant in the birth chart, therefore, we all have meaning that can be explored here. We are complex individuals and we can easily slip into an oversimplification of who we are when we try to fit into an astrological mold or set of characteristics too closely.
2nd-8th Houses of Values & Secrets
The 2nd and 8th may not be traditionally associated with love and relating. The 2nd house is related to our values, finances, and material belongings while the 8th house is symbolic of how we share these things with others and what is left behind through the symbolic process of death and transformation.
I think this is a key component of any relationship. The zodiac signs and placements located in the 2nd house speak to our own sense of self-worth, self-love, and self-care. We all know how important having a healthy relationship with our own self is when it comes to being able to then share, relate, and love others.
The zodiac sign on the cusp or planets in the 2nd house can help us understand what we value in creating stability, security, and a foundation in a relationship. This can translate into our own sense of self-worth and illuminates how we can find a deeper sense of self-love.
The zodiac sign on the cusp or planets in the 8th house can help us understand what we share and what we keep to ourselves when it comes to love, dating, and relationships. This house may symbolize the secrets we keep, hidden financial indiscretions, and the shadow sides of falling in love. This house can help us explore how we obsess, cheat, and consume in relationship.
Working with the planets and signs in these houses can help us better understand shame related to sex and love, self-worth, and the value in sharing and partnering.
5th House of Creativity, Sex, Pleasure
The 5th house is a creative house. sex, affairs, pleasure, pro-creation, and romance are all associated with the 5th house. It is also the house of creative forces and therefore associated with children.
The zodiac sign on the cusp and planets located in the 5th house speaks to how we connect to the wild, primal, and sexual natures of our being. It shows where we may want to go deeper into exploring our sexuality and relationship with experiencing pleasure.
This house can help us understand our relationship to reproduction, procreation, and children, including healing the inner child archetype.
The 5th house helps us get in touch with how we want to display and perform identity in order to feel attractive and receive or give appreciation for our sexual and/or gender identities. Planets in this house may illuminate what type of kink you are into, what turns you on, and how these things play out in your sex life.
12th House of Bonds & Bondage
The 12th house is a tricky one to bring into the relationship mix. This house is traditionally a place associated with prisons, hospitals, and mystery. In the context of relationships I think the 12th house is related to how we view bonds and bondage.
If you start to feel trapped in your relationship or in an endless cycle of bondage to another person then look to the 12th house in your chart. The zodiac sign on the cusp or planets in this house will speak to the nature of how you bond to others.
The 12th house puts us directly in touch with the deep soul nature of our being. It opens us up to vulnerability and the real life consequences we take on when bonding with another person or persons.
Hidden fantasies (along with the 5th and 8th house) may play out through the energies symbolized in the 12th house. This house is the one we are most out of touch with because it is located behind our Ascendent or Rising sign. This means we often take the longest to address, understand, and integrate the lessons of our 12th house.
When it comes to love and relating, these can be the lessons in life that take the longest and the hardest to learn. A deep soul or ancestral memory exists in the 12th house that speaks to how we repeat cycles in relationships and relive moments from the past by projecting things onto others.
The 12th house (along with the 5th, 7th, + 8th houses) lets us explore a variety of sexuality related themes including; attraction, repulsion, shame, abuse, fetish, desire, romance, obsession, gender, marriage, bonds, bondage, fantasy, sex, etc.
The deep soul ties we have with others can flirt between bond and bondage. The 12th house is the symbolic room in our being where we can confront our deepest sense of self in relation to our sexuality and relationships.
Personal Planets in Love: Venus, Mars, Mercury
Venus♀︎through the Zodiac Signs – Attraction
Venus is how we sense, feel, and experience attraction and love.
Venus in Aries ♈︎
Venus in Aries will be attracted to people with bold and courageous self-expression. There will be a tendency to express passion and love with intensity and an inner fire for the people you love.
Venus in Taurus ♉︎
Venus in Taurus will show up as deeply affectionate and sensual. You will want to be touched and taken care of. Beautiful and comfortable surroundings are important to you. There will be a tendency to want to share beauty with others.
Venus in Gemini ♊︎
Venus in Gemini is a high-spirited energy. You will often fall in love with the idea of someone, friends, and people who spark your interest. Love and affection for you should feel spontaneous and new, you aren’t one to stick around if things feel stagnate.
Venus in Cancer ♋︎
Venus in Cancer radiates a sensitive and soft energy. This placement needs love and appreciation on a deep soul level in order to feel secure. There may be a tendency to spread your affections out to many people in your search for love.
Venus in Leo ♌︎
Venus in Leo seeks creativity and appreciation in love. This placement represents generosity when sharing and exploring sex, sexuality, and gender identity in relationship. Emphasis is placed on the deep need for authentic self-expression.
Venus in Virgo ♍︎
Venus in Virgo is an idealist in love. With this placement there will be an appreciation for good conversation and cerebral connection with others. Relationships are a quality over quantity experience, taking on a tone of critical analysis in striving for fulfillment.
Venus in Libra ♎︎
Venus in Libra is attracted to beauty and aesthetics. A certain kind of artisty, elegance, and charm is present with this placement. This placement may indicate a desire to experiment and share your love with multiple people, be in polyamorous relationships, or open relationships.
Venus in Scorpio ♏︎
Venus in Scorpio creates a very loyal intensity. If trust is broken it can be very hard or almost impossible to regain. This placement connects through physical touch along with a spiritual connection. Affection for partners can often feel deep and soulful.
Venus in Sagittarius ♐︎
Venus in Sagittarius has a very open and friendly vibe. This placement brings a sense of freedom in gender expression and sexuality. There is a fiery creative energy that shows through in your attraction towards self and others.
Venus in Capricorn ♑︎
Venus in Capricorn is attracted to a sense of restraint, loyalty, and dedication. There is an earthy sensuality and openness in expressing your sexuality one-on-one with others. You tend to see be attracted to people for their personality as opposed to outward appearances.
Venus in Aquarius ♒︎
Venus in Aquarius has a tendency to be attracted to most everyone. Friendships can often have an underlying tone of sexuality or flirtation. This placement is very cerebral and senses attraction through the mind and creative self-expression.
Venus in Pisces ♓︎
Venus in Pisces has a very romantic energy. There is complete absorption into the soul of another person with this placement. Attraction can develop when the deeper creative undercurrent is felt and sensed. This can be channeled into bonding with others through art, music, and creativity.
Mars ♂︎through the Zodiac Signs – Sexuality
Mars helps us understand the quality of our sexuality and desire.
Mars in Aries ♈︎
Mars in Aries has a very fiery and passionate vibe. Sexuality is expressed with impulsivity and openness. There is a tendency to be sexuality adventurous, unattached, and vocal.
Mars in Taurus ♉︎
Mars in Taurus has an earthy and sensual energy. There is a deep connection with the body and how sexuality and pleasure are expressed through the physical. A tendency towards stubbornness make the sexual energy tenacious and long lasting.
Mars in Gemini ♊︎
Mars in Gemini is flirtatious and expressive. Sexuality is experimented with through role play, playfulness, and performing gender. A curiosity is present allowing for an open and authentic exploration of sexuality.
Mars in Cancer ♋︎
Mars in Cancer is fiercely loving and affectionate. Sexuality is expressed with a sense of generosity and sometimes jealousy or possessiveness. A desire to know people through sex is present which creates a deep sense of intimacy even in more casual relationships.
Mars in Leo ♌︎
Mars in Leo is a bit wild and indulgent when it comes to sex. Sexual energy is fiery and romantic. This Mars placement may represent underlying sexual tension in various relationships and partnerships. Sexuality is a creative act for Mars in Leo.
Mars in Virgo ♍︎
Mars in Virgo enjoys physical release and playing with dynamics of power and control in sexuality. Privacy may be a very important part of the sexual experience for individuals with this placement. Keeping secrets and multiple sexual exploits under wraps.
Mars in Libra ♎︎
Mars in Libra cools down the tone of the fiery martian energy. Equality and shared pleasure is important to this placement. There may be an interest in kink and role playing. Expression of sexual energy can be soft and muted.
Mars in Scorpio ♏︎
Mars in Scorpio is sexually potent energy. With a tendency for a high sex drive and secretly intense desire. There is a need for loyalty and deep commitment before fully letting one’s sexuality to be expressed within partnerships.
Mars in Sagittarius ♐︎
Mars in Sagittarius is sexually open and experimental. There is almost nothing and no one that is off limits when it comes to sex. Exploring sexuality through adventure, trial, and error is key.
Mars in Capricorn ♑︎
Mars in Capricorn is grounded sexual energy. There is a tendency for a high sex drive which may control some decision making at times. This placement needs sex as a way to release pressure present in relationships.
Mars in Aquarius ♒︎
Mars in Aquarius is candid and forward. The sexual energy is selective and unlikely to be shared with just anyone. There may be a desire to be friends before exploring sexually with partners.
Mars in Pisces ♓︎
Mars in Pisces is spiritually potent energy. Sexual connection with others needs to be deep, profound, and transcendental. Experimentation through prolonged acts of pleasure is likely.
Mercury ☿ through the Zodiac Signs – Communication
Mercury speaks to our communication style in the context of relationships.
Mercury in Aries ♈︎
Mercury in Aries has an impulsive and spirited relationship communication style. This placement is not afraid to speak their honest thoughts and feelings. Conversations may have a tendency to get heated when emotions are heightened.
Mercury in Taurus ♉︎
Mercury in Taurus is romantic in relationship communication style. This placement is hoping for and able to give compliments and facilitate conversation. There may be a tendency to hide one’s authentic feelings beneath masked statements.
Mercury in Gemini ♊︎
Mercury in Gemini is a relationship talker. The communication style will be very much based in conversation, discussion, and sharing thoughts + opinions. Relationships may focus on the mental energy and identifying emotions as opposed to feeling them.
Mercury in Cancer ♋︎
Mercury in Cancer needs reassurance in love. Open communication and sharing of genuine emotions and feelings is very important with this placement. Words are a valuable tool for self-expression within relationships.
Mercury Leo ♌︎
Mercury in Leo brings out a charismatic and energized communication style in relationships. There is a leadership tone present often making the Mercury in Leo individual dominant in conversation. Emotional needs are often met through deep conversation and intellectual discussion.
Mercury in Virgo ♍︎
Mercury in Virgo is devoted to a useful and productive relationship communication style. This placement will decipher the hidden meanings in what partner(s) are saying and feel frustrated if they cannot access this information. Deep relationship understanding and knowledge is found through verbal and more subtle forms of communication.
Mercury in Libra ♎︎
Mercury in Libra loves to talk about love and relating. This placement will place emphasis on everyone’s voice being heard and all sides of the story having a chance to be told. A tendency to hide behind the story can keep the Mercury in Libra individual from getting to the heart of a matter.
Mercury in Scorpio ♏︎
Mercury in Scorpio has an investigative relationship communication style. Sensing the hidden under currents in their partners’ words. An ability to read body language and other non-verbal cues gives this placement the feeling they are one step ahead.
Mercury in Sagittarius ♐︎
Mercury in Sagittarius’ relationship communicate style is very in the moment while keeping things open-ended and flexible. There can be a tendency to intellectualize feelings of self and partners. A big picture take on the relationship keeps conversations about love broad reaching, interesting, and changeable.
Mercury in Capricorn ♑︎
Mercury in Capricorn in relationship communication is sincere and candid. This can come off as abrasive to partner(s) when not delivered with a sense of sweetness. Talking honestly through relationships and issues will be central to this placement.
Mercury in Aquarius ♒︎
Mercury in Aquarius takes an open-minded approach to relationship communication. This placement has high expectations of others and wants conversation about love to be enlightened and idealistic yet rational. Expression of ideas will come easily, expression of emotions may need some coaxing.
Mercury in Pisces ♓︎
Mercury in Pisces communication style is emotional and sensing. It can be hard to intellectualize or name specific feelings in conversation. Much of the relationship communication may happen through veiled messaging, non-verbal cues, and body language.
Types of Astrology Relationship Charts
There are two significant astrology charts you can generate when wanting to analyze your relationship with another person(s). These are the synastry and the composite charts.
Synastry Relationship Chart in Astrology
The synastry chart is a look into how the exact zodiac, sign, and house placements geometrically align to another persons placements. This astrological chart can show you which aspects are significant between you and the other person.
Knowing the birth time of both parties helps with the chart’s accuracy but you can still look at aspects between signs and planets without a birth time. Running a synastry chart between you and a partner can reveal what is most prominently symbolized between you.
For example, if you find a lot of dynamic squares this could indicate you have a lot to learn form each other. If you find that your partner’s Sun, Venus, or Mars planetary placement is located in your 7th house this may indicate that this is a very significant relationship for you with a lot of potential for understanding and growth.
There are so many possibilities when people come together in relationship. The synastry chart can help to highlight where the energy is most prominent. The list below gives a brief meaning for each planetary relationship in a synastry chart.
Planet’s Meaning in Synastry List
- Rising/Ascendent Sign for compatibility
- Earth for manifested reality together
- Sun for personality connection
- Moon emotional connection
- Mars for sexual chemistry
- Venus for attraction and beauty
- Mercury for communication
- Saturn boundaries, commitment, limits + control
- Jupiter for success + excess + shared beliefs
- Neptune for fantasy + confusion
- Uranus for the unseen + unpredictable + memory
- Pluto for soul evolution through relationship + power dynamics
- North + South Nodes magnetism + spiritual impact on each other
You can then look at the aspect relationship between houses, elements, and each planet to each other planet. There is a lot to explore so do not get too stuck on the details. Remember none of this is prescriptive or predictive of your fate with another person! Synastry relationships are just symbolic of possible potential and present energy.
Composite Relationship Chart in Astrology
When people come together a third entity is created in a sense. Say you and your partner start dating. On your own you are both still individuals yet the relationship is the combination of you both together. The composite chart is symbolic of the relationship, its own entity really.
There are several different ways of calculating a composite chart. I like to keep things straight forward and use a method that draws up a chart using the mid-point of each planetary placement between birth charts.
For example, if you have Venus in Virgo and your partner has Venus in Aquarius then the mid-point Venus placement would fall somewhere around Sagittarius. You can generate a mid-point method composite and other relationship charts on astro.com.
The new chart created by the relationship speaks to the subtle spiritual energies that underly and interconnect us to everything in this universe and to each other. Composites are an interesting look at what symbolic power is present when we get into relationship. Read it much like you would a natal or birth chart.
The meanings given here are a general guideline and should not be taken as fact. We all relate and love differently, have had our own journeys in relationship, with sexuality, gender, and identity.
All of these things tend to come up and are mirrored in our partnerships. The significance of relationships in our lives cannot be understated. We do not exist in a vacuum. Astrology is one tool we can use to explore ourselves in relationship more deeply.